American Idol: Top 10 - Songs from their birth years

This theme is also known as "Songs Guaranteed to Make You Feel Old." At least if you (like me) are older than these Idol contestants. If I was a contestant, I could sing Dancing Queen by Abba or Tonight's the Night by Rod Stewart. Given my own preferences and heritage, I'd be going with the Swedes. And since it is really difficult to sing four part harmony by yourself, I would probably be going down in a blaze of glory.

The show begins with Seacrest emerging from the opening doors like Bob Barker. Paula is super sparkly again, with strange demi-gloves. I'm sensing a theme here.

Top 10, Come on Down!!!!

Is it my imagination that Jason Castro's pants looked skin colored? I had to rewind to make sure he wasn't going sans pants. Thankfully, my eyes deceived me.


Ramiele Malubay (1987: Alone - Heart) Her outfit is highly unfortunate, the high waisted shorts were odd with the Flashdance inspired shirt. She was a little off key in places, and the back up singers out sung her on the chorus. I do think it was one of her better performances, but I don't know if it will be enough to save her. I think maybe she should have sung Shake Your Love by Debbie Gibson. That might have been fun. I am glad that Simon called out Randy for the weird intonation. Ramiele has been sick (apparently laryngitis), so maybe she'll get some sympathy.

Jason Castro (1987: Fragile - Sting) Jason was an adorable baby. My goodness. He's rocking the guitar again tonight (and thankfully, he's much better than he was as a kid). I have never heard this song before, and it's nice. He made some seriously weird facial movements while singing, but I can forgive him that for a wonderful performance. That fit him quite well, and he broke out the foreign language again. At least this time, it was Spanish. I think that Simon mistakes Jason's low key attitude for not caring. I liked it.

Syesha Mercado (1987: If I Were Your Woman - Stephanie Mills) Another 1987!! I wish that Syesha would never do the baby cry again, it's seriously creepy. I have never heard this song before, but it was good! Again, I thought that the back up singers tried to overpower the main act. This I think was possibly Syesha's best performance to date. She owned the stage, it was beautiful. I wanted her to go home a couple weeks ago, but I will remember this one.

Chikezie Ezie Listening (1985: If Only For One Night - Luther Vandross) Reclaiming the Ezie Listening title with ease, I am further convinced that Chikezie could have a career in Bluegrass. He has a great voice, his tone is nice, but I am constantly bored by this song. And then he was talking back to Simon. Never a good idea. He might as well have been singing We Are the World, that was from 1985. It would have been fun to hear him sing Raspberry Beret by Prince. He could have made that fun.

Brooke White (1983: Every Breath You Take - The Police) Whoah now, she f'd up the beginning. That's no good, but at least she fixed it. What is good is that Brooke is behind the piano again and is no longer flailing around. Her hair is pretty bad, I like her better with her waves. After the horribly botched beginning, she pulled it back and did a good job. She is, however, beginning to bore me. Paula's bejeweled gloves are distracting to me. I also think that Brooke with the piano alone would have been better, but can she do anything upbeat without looking drugged off her mind? I would have loved to hear her sing Sweet Dreams by The Eurythmics. That would have been awesome.

Michael Johns (1979: We Are the Champions - Queen) Unfortunately, he sounded rather screechy in the beginning. Once he got into the song, he did much better. The thing about Freddy Mercury is that even when he was going full voice, he never sounded like he was screaming. If you are going to sing a Queen song, you have to do it without yelling. And of course, because I didn't love it, the judges do. I love Michael, but I like it better when he is singing, instead of hollering at me. He did own the stage, I'll give him that, but I think he could have done a more musical performance.

Carly Smithson (1983: Total Eclipse of the Heart - Bonnie Tyler) Carly's mom looks a little like Lucy Lawless. (And therefore, Carly looks a little like her, too) She's gorgeous. Carly is much better off without the giant glasses she had as a young child. I think that this song is a superb choice by Carly. Again, though, the back up singers are trying their best to out sing her. Boo to them. I think this is my favorite Carly performance to date. It fits her voice wonderfully, and she did a great job with the transitions. I don't know that the last little run was necessary, but that song was what I was waiting for her to do. I really think that the biggest problem was the back up singers. Someone please turn down their microphones!

David Archuleta (1990: You're the Voice - John Farnham) What the heck kind of song is this? At least it's a little peppier, but it makes me want to vomit. He could choose any song from 1990 and he chose that piece of crap? Instead of slow and boring, he went for fast and boring. I think Simon was putting a dig in to David's reportedly overbearing father when he said he would be astounded if David A. picked the song himself. Heck, at least he didn't sing All I Want to Do is Make Love to You by Heart. Nothing like a song that says "I didn't want to pay for IVF, so I picked up a hitchhiker to be my Baby Daddy."

Kristy Lee Cook (1984: God Bless the USA - Lee Greenwood) The flat irons got a workout for tonight's show. Be gone, curls! Kristy was in good voice tonight, and her shirt was pretty. The producers got to bust out the American flag graphics for her background. Bet they've been waiting for that one. Vote for Kristy, America, or you just aren't patriotic. This was a HUGE improvement from the past couple of weeks. I am actually amazed that Simon liked it so much. I do think it was a much stronger improvement, and I know that the judges want to keep her around at least until Country week.

David Cook (1982: Billie Jean - Michael Jackson as covered by Chris Cornell) Dang, he was a funny looking baby. This was amazing. I went on YouTube to hear the Chris Cornell version to see how different David Cook did it, and it was definitely his take on this cover, but he did make it his own, adding some more edge to it. I adored this performance. He was just outstanding. He has shown that he can rock, he has shown that he can do a ballad type song (that was pretty much a power ballad). And there was no moonwalking in sight. He wins the night for me, easily. Captain Comb Over does indeed have super powers.

I'll be voting for David Cook (many times), and I'll throw a couple votes to Jason, a couple to Syesha (she was really quite good tonight), and to Carly. I'll throw a vote or two to Michael Johns, purely for the middle of the song, and his potential. Though Kristy Lee Cook was good, I am not voting for her. Same with Brooke, I am bored with her.

I think little Ramiele might be gone. I would not be surprised to see Chikezie Ezie Listening in the bottom with her. I hope that David A. goes in the bottom 3, because that was just an embarrassing song choice, and some one needs to pay for it. I don't think he has any chance of going home, though. Jason might be in the bottom, too, and maybe that would put some pep in his step.

New Show Alert – MissGuided

How can you go wrong when Ashton Kutcher is a guest star on the premiere of a show, and he's playing a dreamy Spanish substitute teacher? It might get old, because there are a lot of asides to the camera. I am not really familiar with any of the actors, except peripherally. The main actress kind of reminds me of a friend of mine, so I instantly like her. It is a cute show, we'll see how it pans out.

Survivor Micronesia: Fans vs. Favorites - Week 6

(Also known as, the episode many people will miss, because it's on Wednesday instead of Thursday due to stupid Basketball)

At Malakal (or Ozzie's Tribe, as Jeff calls them in the recap) Ozzie's hair is starting to get longer and cute. He was really annoyed at Tracy for breeding insecurities in the tribe and wanting to kill chickens. Because, after all, they've got “massive crabs.” Don't take that quote out of context. Tracy (rightly) notes that Ozzie is set to walk home with the game if someone doesn't do something about it.

Airai women spend some time complaining, and James is annoyed by their squeamishness about being dirty and smelly. “We are playing Survivor,” he said. I smell a Reward Challenge coming on that involves soap and other niceties, the way the editors are playing it out.

Super Ozzie scales trees like a monkey at Malakal, and Erik (according to Cirie) spews stardust when talking about Ozzie. (When Erik learns how to climb the coconut trees, Ozzie has another zinger of a quote, “We've got good nuts now.”) Cirie is scared of rowing out into the ocean when Ozzie wants to fish in the reef, and seeths when the others enjoy the water. She's annoying me.

Reward Challenge:
Another multipart, multistage challenge. I was totally right about the reward being a bunch of toiletries (sponsored by Herbal Essences). Cause that wasn't predictable. Airai chooses Eliza to be a caller to the blindfolded remainder, and Malakal chooses Cirie. Good decisions, since both are loudmouths. Malakal did a better job of the first part, and the puzzle was not much trouble for them. Malakal wins the reward, and the women of Airai are going to have to learn to stay stinky. Jason is heading to exile with Tracy, who has to miss out on the Reward. That sucks.

Malakal is treated with massive amounts of baked goods and fruit along with their Herbal Essences. Ozzie and Amanda jump in the shower together, and Amanda soon gets half naked, along with Ami. Ozzie is pleased, Cirie is amazed at the brazenness, and Erik had to wipe the drool off his chin. Nice.

The rain comes and Airai is miserable. Kathy spent a good amount of time complaining bitterly that it is harder than it looks on television. She ended up whining for a while, then crying. She asked to go home. She's cracking up. The boat came and brought Jeff (who hates quitters), and took Kathy away. I think this is the first time someone has quit, not at a Tribal Council, for non-medical reasons. If it had to be someone, I am not at all surprised it was Tracy.

Malakal is looking all shiny and clean, Amanda's hair is positively bouncy. Cirie and Amanda are scheming together, and Amanda admits to seeing the arrogant side of Ozzie. Ruh-roh, Ozzlets in danger?

Immunity Challenge

Another great multi-part challenge. Ozzie takes two turns with the swimming, then calls for Erik, who reveals himself to be not as balanced as Ozzie. After he had a bit of trouble, Ozzie took the next one again, and the last one, too. See, there's a reason that he is arrogant. It's because he's good. Really good. Superstar good.

The puzzle is like a giant tetris game, trying to make a square with the pieces. Cirie and Amanda squander the lead that Ozzie gave them, and Eliza and Jason solve the puzzle first. Airai wins the Immunity again.

Ami goes to Tracy to do some scheming. They want to get rid of Ozzie. Ami doesn't know that Ozzie has the Hidden Immunity Idol. Amanda, I think, is the only one on the current Malakal who knows about it. It's a tough decision, I think mostly for Amanda, because Ozzie is so strong with her. If they decide to vote for Ozzie, will Erik tell his hero?

No need to worry about it, it's all for Tracy.

Nothing shocking revealed at Tribal Council.. I am really happy to see Tracy gone.

The votes went down like this.

Amanda - Tracy

Ozzie - Tracy
Erik - Tracy
Cirie -Tracy
Tracy -Ozzie
Ami -Tracy

Another injury next week, it looks like Erik takes a rib shot. Yipes!

American Idol Results 3/19/08: And then there were 10

(Sorry about the delay in posting, my internet was down last night)

First and foremost, Shamelessly Self Promoting Guest Mentors this season are revealed:

• Dolly Parton (presumably for a Country week)

• Mariah Carey (presumably for high pitched squealing night)

• Andrew Lloyd Webber (I'm guessing Broadway tunes. We all know how much Simon loves Broadway)

• Neil Diamond (Because American Idol isn't cheesy enough, let's throw some Sweet Caroline on it)

Also announced was the return of the song writing competition. If you think you are talented, please submit something. Anything has to be better than This is My Now. For heaven's sake.

And it's time for a group sing, because these kids haven't had enough chances to slaughter Beatles songs. David A. starts it off with My Guitar Gently Weeps, and I wish that someone had sung it last night. The other men join in. Brooke again proves that she shouldn't move, and I think Ramiele's microphone was off, but she was looking very happy about singing with Brooke. I am not familiar with the song the girls were singing, but whatever it was, something about Kristy Lee Cook made the camera man nearly topple over. Amanda was conspicuously missing from the rest of the girls' song, because it sounded sweet and nice. The whole group got together for another one, and then Amanda had a little solo, which was of course garbled and screechy. The hopefuls again avoided doing any real dancing, instead posing in near-unison. Better than last weeks' slightly frightening freezes.

The recap of last night again showed Brooke dancing (and I use the term loosely) like she was on Ecstasy (though we know she doesn't do anything like that, she's pure as the new fallen snow). Among other things. Not much good.

Now onto the time for eliminations! The new stage lends to a more dramatic whittling down process. Brooke is first, behind her on a giant screen, a silent video reminder of how much she sucked last night, with a couch on one side for those who can relax right into the Top 10, and three torturous looking stools for the Bottom 3. Brooke heads on over to the couch, and Carly is quickly dispatched to the stools! How surprising! David A. is going to bring his brand of bland goodness into the Top 10, he's on the couch. Michael Johns is also on the Couch of Happiness. Carly and her frightening stilettoed boots are left to chill on the Stools of Doom over a break.

After the break, Carly has to site by herself for a while longer, while we are treated to Behind the Scenes of the Ford commercial. It was actually kind of fun. Everyone was made to dress like they are in the 1940's. Except for Jason Castro. White boys in the 40's didn't generally have dreadlocks, so they don't even try. David Cook was pretty funny (though almost non-existant in the actual commercial). Ramiele's glasses are cute, and Brooke, Kristy Lee, and Michael looked great in that era of dress.

Back to business, David Cook is deservedly in the Top 10. Kristy Lee Cook (in another shimmery, mylar-like top, they really must have gotten some great deals on those) ends up again in the Bottom 3, and joins Carly on the Stools of Destiny. Jason Castro's French was apparently good enough to make it over onto the Couch. Ramiele skates into the Top 10, after Ryan tortures her a bit. And another break.

Instead of finding out who's going to round out the Bottom 3, we are treated to another round of Awkward Questions Asked Awkwardly. Seriously? Why do I, as a viewer, care how Simon spends his money? The Kiss Scene question was funny, and Simon was amusing, but it was soooo unnecessary. Blessedly, we were not subjected to any more. At least not tonight.

Anyone else notice that Ryan mentioned Kellie Pickler's boob job (“Here's a contestant from Season 5 who has. . . grown in so many ways since being on the show.” Subtle, Seacrest). At least Kellie doesn't have the matronly curled hair that she had when she was on last season. Kellie is so nasal, it's distracting. So is the way that she claps with the microphone in her hand. I know that the country world likes her. I don't live in that world. She's funny, she's cute, and she is a pretty good performer, but I just really dislike her music.

After another break, there's a plug for this year's Idol Gives Back, showing what some of the money raised last year went to do. I have to say, I am happy to see American Idol doing some concrete good in the world. I could have seen it without hearing Fantasia. I'm not a fan of hers, either. Elliot Yamin and his new teeth got a baby named after him, and he is understandably touched.

Returning to the business at hand, Syesha enters the Top 10 on the Comfy Couches, and is soon joined by Chikezie. Amanda takes the third place in the bottom 3, though she does not have to sit on the Stools.

Narrowing the Bottom 3 to the Bottom 2, Carly is sent to the Safety Sofa. I hope that being in the Bottom 3 makes her kick it up a little, because I think she was a lock. Amanda is sent home, and Kristy Lee Cook rounds out the Top 10.

Amanda is now Celebrated Home by Ruben Studdard (and I learned that it is a cover of a Kenny Loggins song. How does that make it even worse? It was a bad song once, and they re-did it! Insane). I will not miss her. Now at least we don't have to see her garble her way through any more songs. Goodbye, Elvira/Cruella/strangely Delta Burke. Jason was singing along with her, looking mellow as ever. Amanda Overmyer, out. Like Seacrest.

American Idol: Top 11 - Lennon/McCartney Night Take 2

I wish there was some sort of rule that anyone who sang a slow song last week should sing a peppy one this week. Just saying.

Looks like tonight's songs can come from any of the Beatles. So they can call it two different themes

Amanda Overmyer (Back in the USSR) - Shaky shaky shaky. She sounded terrible. Out of breath. She seemed to be chasing the music, and kind of lost. That was terrible karaoke. Awful. Dreadful. Why does Randy like her? And Paula, too. Not like I should question anything that Paula does or says. Simon says she is "in danger of becoming boring." She's already there in my eyes. She's also really high on herself.

Kristy Lee Cook (You've Got to Hide Your Love Away) - She's got a great personality. If she doesn't suck it, I could like her. She looks like she's wearing a mylar dress, coated in saran wrap. Wonder if that was on the clearance rack at Metallics R' Us. She started out pretty well, but in the middle, she hit some truly awful notes. She made a very nice song into a very harsh, almost frightening song. The end got much better. At least it wasn't as manic as last week. I think Amanda was much worse than her. I want her to stick around to see her blow Simon out of his socks. I think she has it in her.

David Archuleta (The Long and Winding Road) - He really looks like he should be on Who's the Boss, Tony Danza's nephew or something. My god, at this point, I might have to transfer Chikezie's Easy Listening moniker to David. He at least sounds good, but I want him to sing something young and modern, not Beatles elevator music. I think I am over David A, too. He sounds good, he remembered his lyrics, but why does Randy always tell people to sing runs randomly? Ugh. It's like they have already decided he needs to get into the end, and they refuse to say anything bad about him at all. I disagree.

Michael Johns (A Day in the Life) - I just love his voice. He hit a bad note on the falsetto, but the rest of it was lovely. He's a fantastic performer. My friends think he messed up near the end, but not enough to make me not like him. I want to know how Randy can pick on his song choice and kiss David A's boring boots. I think he was far superior to anyone else tonight so far. The judges pissed on him, and elevated David A. I do not understand. Hilarious that Paula picked on him for wearing the ear monitor and he wasn't.

Brooke White (Here Comes the Sun) - Her dress came from the same rack as Julianne Hough's last night. She's dancing like it's a much faster song, almost like she was on something. She was all slinky and weird. The transition between sitting and standing was very awkward. I wish she had sung something faster, but I think that she has shown her vulnerability, because she can't move at all. She was annoying when she was protesting about the judges criticism.

David Cook (Day Tripper) - Captain Comb Over's wearing a vest, a very loose tie (it almost has an ascot feel), and a leather jacket. That's odd. He's rocking this song out. I liked the guitar work. Very nice, David. He just pulled out way in front of tonight's pack for me tonight. The voice box was sweet. I like him. I like him a lot. The judges uneven criticism is maddening.

Carly Smithson (Blackbird) - He outfit looks like maternity clothes. Bad maternity clothes, not cute maternity clothes. The shirt makes her look all hunched over. She looks a little like Delta Burke (although, in this picture that I found looks a lot like Amanda and Carly combined. Weird). She was good in the beginning, but when she went up high she hit some really bum notes. I really liked the lower notes. It was really boring. The judges show such favoritism for her and David A, it's soooooo annoying. At least Simon criticized her a little. I don't care WHY people choose songs. If it sucks, it sucks. The story behind the song choice makes no difference at all.

Jason Castro (Michelle) - Risky risky risky singing something with so much French. He's got such a pleasing voice, and he did a lovely job with the French pronunciation! He has such a great low range, I think he was trying so hard to get all the words in there, properly, that he did disconnect a little. He is such a charming personality, that might just get him far.

Syesha Mercado (Yesterday)- She's very pretty tonight (what else is new), and her dress is rather peacocky. Some of the runs were indulgent and unnecessary in most cases, but it was the best she has been so far. For that, I will remember her for longer than previously. It was not genius, but it was quite quite nice. Minus some of those screechy high notes that didn't need to happen. But, overall, quite pretty. Like a peacock. At least she dressed the part.





Chikezie (I've Just Seen a Face) - I was bored again. Then he pulled out the harmonica andI got confused. I think that Chikezie has proved that he should sing blue grass. He goes well with the steel guitars. It was a rather schitzophrenic arrangement, but it worked for me. Last week was far superior. He is not my favorite of the night, but he cannot reclaim his Ezie Listening title. That's a good thing.

Ramiele Malubay (I Should Have Known Better) - Let's see - David Cook's hat from last week, a thin t-shirt, an S&M corset, and tight skinny jeans. Yup, good fashion sense there, Malubay. I like the deep tone of her voice, but again I am bored. She just needs to learn what works for her voice. That wasn't it. I just think she's in over her head. It's a shame, because she's sweet.

What a terribly disappointing night. No one blew me away. I'm voting for Michael Johns, David Cook, and Jason Castro. I think I'll toss in a couple for Syesha. Maybe one for the Chikezie who finished his song. Not the one who started it. Bottom three is wide open. So many were completely sub-par. My guess is Amanda, Ramiele, and Kristy Lee Cook. It could be anyone, though.

For the love of God, no one call or text message asking for more Beatles songs. It obviously didn't work out so well this time. What a mess.

Tomorrow, Kelly Pickler. Yay? Hopefully we get to boot someone who deserves it.

Dancing With the Stars: 3/17/08

I can't watch the whole show tonight because of TV scheduling conflicts, and even though we have a dual tuner dvr, alas, my husband watches 3 shows and one of them is on tonight at 9, opposite New Amsterdam. *sigh* I will just have to write about the parts I can watch.

The new season starts with a group number, also known as "Dancing Far Above Anything Even the Best of the Stars Could Ever Hope to Attain." Of course the dancers are phenomenal.

Looking more orange than a tangerine and Tara Reid put together, Samantha Harris, awkward co-host, joins Tim Bergeron, who is always ready with a scripted witty retort. "The Timpani Tells the Tale," indeed, Tim. Indeed it does.

The couples this season are:

Penn Gillette with Cross-Eyed Kym Johnson
Jason Taylor with Edyta Slewinska
Christian de la Fuente & Cheryl Burke
Adam Carolla & Julianne Hough
Mario & Karina Smirnoff
Steve Gutenberg & Anna Trebunskaya
Shannon Elizabeth & Derek Hough
Monica Selles & Jonathan Roberts
Marissa Jaret Winouker & Tony Dovolani
Pricilla Presley & Louis van Amstel
Kristi Yamaguchi & Mark Ballas
Marlee Matlin & Fabian Sanchez

(And no, I don't know who all of the "stars" are either)

See, I love this show because it is ridiculously cheesy and self-aware of it's cheesiness.

Tonight, it's all the male stars, tomorrow, all the women, with no elimination this week. So if someone really sucks, we get the pleasure of seeing them dance twice. Yay!

Disclaimer: I know pretty much diddley squat about dancing. I can comment pretty knowledgebly on singing, but my dancing is better described as energetic flailing. But, I like to see people who can dance.

First off, Kym of the random Y and Penn (of Penn and Teller, the one who talks). I think Penn is 6'6", and he towers over Kym. Let's see how they do, dancing the Cha cha. Penn knows how to work the stage, and he isn't the worst dancer eve on the show. Kym does a lot of him shymmying (yes, I put that extra y i there just for her), and Penn managed to pull out some magic at the end. No, seriously, magic. He made a little bouquet appear. Gotta love him. I agreed with the judges, Penn didn't have great footwork, but he had good attitude. The judges give them 5, 6, and 5. 16/30. Not the best way to start out the show, but not dreadful.

Next is Jason Taylor (he's a football player) and Edyta Slewinska dancing the Fox Trot. He looked pretty graceful and flexible in the pre-dance package. He's also hugely tall, but he's slim, so he can carry himself in a more graceful manner. He has a nice glide to his step. I think I spied a slight lift in the middle, which is against the rules, but he's so tall, it might be hard to avoid! Wonder if I saw it correctly. Carrie Anne usually picks those things up pretty adeptly. Overall, I thought it was very pleasant and smooth. Carrie Anne didn't mention a lift, so maybe I was wrong. Scores are 7, 8, and 7. 22/30 total. Nice.

Christian de la Fuente (he's on Ugly Betty) and Cheryl Burke are up third, doing the cha cha. Funny quote - "I'm from Chile, my country is not known for dancing, it's known for Chilean Sea Bass and wine." His shoulders seemed really tight, but his feet moved nicely. His hips were a little looser than his shoulders, but his feet really were the best thing tonight about his dance. You could tell he was trying really hard, and that's not always a good thing. The judges picked up on the same troubles I did, so that made me feel good. They scored 7,7, and 7. 21/30. About right.

Adam Carolla and Julianne Hough are dancing fourth. I love Adam Carolla (he's funny, The Man Show was hilarious). Julianne is one of my favorite dancers on the show, too, she's fantastic. I'd like to see her whip him into submission, she's a tough little Hough. They are dancing the Fox Trot tonight, to the song Mellow Yellow. Interesting. Adam is pretty stiff, but he got some good kicks in there! His feet are decent, again, but he has a weird expression on his face the whole time (he is a comedian), and he did seem really tight in the upper body. Not as big a disaster as I might have expected. Julianne's dress was kind of foolish, I thought, made her look like a big canPublish Postary colored block, and she is anything but. That's an aside, though. Scores are 5,5, and 5. 15/30. About right.

Boooooooo, I have to stop watching the show now. I was really hoping to see Steve Gutenberg. If I get a chance to watch the remaining performances online, I'll blog them.

Enjoy the season!

A Very Interesting Interview with Chet from Survivor

I was puttering around the internet and found this, and it sure is an interesting interview! Apparently, Chet was seen by the Survivor medics about his foot, and it got left on the editing room floor. He also claims that if he hadn't been voted out, the medics would have pulled him. Which begs the question - if he was going home anyway, why not help his alliance out first and get rid of Ozzie? I'm happy that didn't happen, because I would miss Ozzie terribly, but still...

I still think that Chet has a pretty darned high opinion of himself. And it's slightly terrifying that he gained weight before he went to Micronesia!!