Will this be the week we get rid of Coach? Please?
Post-Tribal, everyone is happy that "the drama" is gone. Coach is on a rampage because Erinn wrote down Stephen's name and Taj wrote down Debbie. He raged to Debbie "We need to bring in the Warrior Alliance. There's a reason it has a name." Because, as we all know, giving something a name gives it more validity. Maybe Coach is a fan of A Wizard of Earthsea, where names hold ultimate power... I don't know. Whatever his reasoning, he's a loon. He went on about how bold and honest he is. Debbie urged him to let it go, because it would drive him nuts. Um, Debbie? He's already there.
After Debbie left him, he complained about cowards all around him, and claimed to not care about the million dollars, but about honor and integrity.
It's all a little too much for Debbie, and she questions the wisdom of sticking with Coach. He's not doing anything around camp, and kind of lounging and lying around being bitter. She talked to JT and the others and said that she's rethinking a lot of her decisions.
It's kind of driving Stephen crazy (and he did a decent impression of her), but she popped up while Stephen was chatting with JT, and pinky-swore that she was there with the two of them. Hmmm.
It's time for the Survivor Auction! Everyone has $500, with bidding in $20 increments. They cannot share money, and cannot share food.
First up was french fries. Taj bid $40, and Debbie (in a failure of math knowledge) tried to bid $50 and $70, finally winning at $100.
Coach got a chicken parm meal with wine for $320.
A mystery item went to JT for $160. And it was a good thing. Nachos, with guacamole and salsa.
Another mystery item went to Stephen for $100, and it was Brazilian chicken hearts. I've had Brazilian chicken hearts, and they are delicious.
Last item - Samsung Instinct (by Sprint), loaded with video messages from home. Only one person can buy it and win it. People can pool money for this one. Taj was given all the money, and she got it for $20 because no one else was going to bid against her.
Can I just say, tears in my eyes seeing her family on that phone. There were also tears in Taj's eyes. She broke down entirely. Her husband ended the message by saying "See you back at camp," and Jeff had to tell her what that meant - literally, see her back at camp. He's the only loved one who is back at camp, unless Taj sends herself AND him to Exile Island, in which case, everyone else will get a loved one back at camp.
Hello, easy decision! Gee, some privacy with her husband, AND good graces of tribemates? Granted, it's not a luxury setting for a reunion, but I think there is only one choice to make.
Everyone else was so thrilled to hear her decision, and she practically sprinted to Exile and her husband. She admitted in confessional to wanting a conjugal visit, and he commented that she's lost a lot of weight, and she said "well, I don't eat!" He said that something about the wild made her sexy, even though she didn't smell great. lol.
Back at camp, the reunions were sweet. JT's sister, Stephen's brother, Debbie's husband, Erinn's dad, Coach's.... assistant coach.
Coach told his assistant coach "Guess what they call me in this game? They call me Dragonslayer." Wait, what? Who calls him Dragonslayer again? The voices in his head? I thought so. And then his assistant coach cracked his back. That's love.
The Survivors shared local delicacies with their loved ones, like a fruit that smells like dirty feet. Yummy.
Over at Exile, Taj's husband was a little shocked at the wildlife, and started a fire in two seconds flat (according to the editors). Very cool. He gave her a nice foot rub, and it was very sweet. They are a very attractive couple.
Back at camp, Stephen kind of broke down a little. JT told his sister he wished he could be with the cows. Debbie feels like she's become a better person because of being on Survivor. Erinn's dad was impressed about how un-girly she is at camp. It was good for her to have someone who cared about her to talk to for a bit.
All too soon, it was time for the loved ones to go.
After they were gone, Debbie approaced JT with some ideas on how to get rid of Coach. Even though I wouldn't trust her farther that I could throw her, I hope she prevails, because I can't stand Coach. JT said that he doesn't know if he can trust someone who turns like that so quickly.
Coach wants to get rid of Taj, because he doesn't want her to play the immunity idol. When Coach is off gathering wood, the others talk and want to get rid of Coach, but say it needs to be a blindside, but a unanimous one. Debbie said that everyone's pretty well had it with Coach. She thinks it should be Erinn and Taj after him. She promised either JT or Stephen that she would hand over an immunity idol to one of them, so she could be voted off third, and she swore to god. Stephen said "I don't know Debbie that well, and I don't know what her relationship with God is, but it's tempting." JT said that he didn't know if she could be trusted, since she was so quick to make such huge promises... and they boys seem tighter with Erinn.
They have to make their way through obstacles, into a field, with 10 spinning math symbols. They have to memorize the symbols, bring them back to the start, write down the symbols in the right order, and solve the equation properly to win. Wow. Tricky.
The first bit in the course is a dig under a log, and JT got himself a bit stuck when his hole wasn't big enough, and Taj followed suit. JT got out easily and raced through the rest of the course to try his luck at the memorization.
Debbie was through second, followed by Coach, then Taj, and Stephen did some falling. And more falling. If he could get to the math, he'd probably do fine...
JT and Debbie were working on the math, and Stephen seemed to get all the symbols at his first go. JT and Stephen were fighting for the finish... were either of them right? Stephen got it! I'm so happy for him. He had a complicated memorization scheme, having to do with making each symbol worth a number, and people being able to remember a 7 digit number, so he made them into a phone number, basically. I'm impressed. Go Stephen, crazy, sandy eyes and all.
JT couldn't help but feel happy about Stephen's win, because they have such a good alliance. I hope that no one tries to get JT out now. That would be not good.
Back at camp, JT and Stephen are feeling pretty good about the win, and talked to Taj, telling her about her chat with Debbie. Stephen and JT chatted alone, and Stephen said "The more I think about it, this Debbie thing is not a good idea." Coach came to join them in the water, and did not seem very welcome. Coach always needs to be reassured that things are going his way, and is sure that he or JT or Stephen is going to win it. Pompous. Ass. Nuff said.
JT says that the sooner he can get rid of the people who he's lied to out of the game, the better.
Probst instantly talked to Coach about his vow to bring the strongest people to the end, and Coach said that his idea of strength might be different than other people's. He sited Stephen as being a boy who went from reading about adventure, to living the adventure. He also says that Debbie's unwavering loyalty makes her strong. Ha.
When asked about Coach, Taj said that he is a "warrior" and a "dragonslayer," and when pressed, she said, "well, that's what he calls himself." Coach instantly denied coming up with that moniker, and Probst, in one of the funniest moves of the season, if not ever, said "Let me guess, it was a tribal chief." Coach said that he likes it when Probst cuts him down to try to ferrett out the truth, but then doesn't offer any up. He said that Taj is strong because of her strength in giving up time with her family, and said it would be difficult to vote her out because of it. Probst asked if JT if Coach is one of the strong ones to bring to the end, and he said that he is honest and strong, so yeah. Debbie then said that Coach's commitment to honesty might be his achiles heel. Debbie talked too much, I think, if Coach is going to get votes tonight. She seemed to think so - looking rather smug.
And she did vote for him - so we'll see if others follow suit (please please please). Taj did not play the hidden idol. She didn't need to, because Debbie was voted out. I kind of expected that, because she was so smug and quick to change her alliances, and that was kind of squirelly.
Now, Coach is more alone. Please let him be gone next. But first, I want a tantrum. A big, fat, insane tantrum.