I am totally unsure about who is going home this week. Last year, they balked at sending anyone home on Idol Gives Back Week, but they also didn't have a separate Results Show (if I remember correctly).
Randy's looking odd tonight (those sideburns are nearing mutton chop territory, and they look painted on), but Paula is looking nearly coherent. Simon looks ever like Simon.
Recap of last night - including recaps of two performances I fast forwarded through, and now I am happier than ever for my fast forwards.
A group sing - complete with the blasted choir - of Shout to the Lord. Gag. What if one of them was Jewish (or some other religion, or like me, none at all?). What a steaming pile of crap*. I want that time back, AI.
Next is a strange celebrity bad lipsynching video of I'm a Believer, with bad green screen mixing of the celebs together. That was also quite awful.
Down to the Business of the Night.
Who will be on the Couch of Comfort? Who will be on the Stools of Peril?
Brooke is full of excuses for her emotions, and is sent to the Sofa of Solace.
David Cook is out next, his hair in full attention (he looks a bit like a rooster), and is quickly told to join Brooke.
David Archuleta comes out next to discover his fate, there is much screaming of adoring fans in the audience. Despite being borrrrrring, he is also safe.
Before the break, Seacrest said "Look at the stools, what does that mean for the people backstage?" If that is his way of eluding to this being a waste of a results show, with no one being eliminated, I am going to be more than angry at wasting an hour of my time.
Forrest Whitaker takes us back to Sad Africa.
Jordan Sparks and Chris Brown perform No Air, which I actually kind of like. It's been stuck in my head for a while, from hearing it on the radio. Jordan is then presented with a bunch of plaques for having tons and tons of downloads. That's cool.
Ford Commercial time, and the effects were pretty cool.
Jason Castro is next up to be told his fate for the night. Ryan awkwardly asks him how much his ukulele cost, and it looks like it was a $600 well spent, as he is safe.
Kristy Lee Cook is next, with lots of blue eyeshadow. She is sent to the Sofas of Solace, which leaves Carly, Syesha, and Michael in the bottom 3. Michael I am of course really upset about, because he was the only one I really liked this week.
When Seacrest cut to the break, saying "Which one will have the lowest number of votes?" Carly gave a little wave and said "Me!" silently. I sure hope she is wrong. I think Syesha's time has come.
Idol Gives Back unites everyone, including all three Presidential Hopefuls. See, American Idol viewers, they DO care.
And ANOTHER break. Bahhhhh.
Syesha and Carly are safe, and Michael Johns is teased with the possibility of a non-elimination week like last year, but alas...
I, personally, am peeeeeeeeaved. He was seriously the only one I liked much at all on Tuesday, and I will absolutely miss him. I was not ready for him to be celebrated home, not at all.
Now I guess I just absolutely want David Cook to take it all.
I hope that Michael makes wonderful cds and gets a lot of air play. Go for it, Michael. Paula looked as shocked as I am. Shocked. I guess America likes terrible drivel songs. Michael got to sing us out, and couldn't hit the high notes, not surprisingly. Carly looked miserable. Now I wish she had been right in her prediction.
*Disclaimer for my religious readers, I don't have a problem with your religion, I just have a problem with crappy sappy songs